Wednesday, July 30, 2014

(Source: katvondevious)

Hello. I fancied a change from the shark with fake muscle arms. Now I’m a jerk and everyone loves me

Hello. I fancied a change from the shark with fake muscle arms. Now I’m a jerk and everyone loves me

I saw the ex and her new bf in Asda today. I turned a corner and suddenly I was walking towards them and they were walking towards me. I looked right at her while my stomach had a feeling of “ah shit” but it’s been over a year so I was more then prepared to have an awkward conversation but she did nothing. I had my Project Get Arms guns out, my tattoo on show and was projecting a swagger that I’m sure exists but she made no visual attempt to start fangirling but she definitely saw me. And then when the asda lady said hello to me I made sure to sound completely chill and cool but saying it like hi instead of the hi SHE expected me to say. Hahaha, I sound like a loon, but it was a weird moment. So yeah.

(Source: falconponcho)

Tuesday, July 29, 2014

I think the heat has made me angry today because I had a go at some customers because they were in the wrong seats and lied to me loads saying that “people were in their seats” so they just decided to move into the very last row. THEY WERE MEANT TO BE IN ROW B, AT THE FRONT, NOBODY WAS SITTING THERE. I called them liars haha. And now this guy at work’s been snapchatting constantly about his dog and I’ve just sent him back with the caption “NOBODY GIVES A SHIT ABOUT YOUR SHITEY DOG”

710642:

well? can he????

710642:

well? can he????

I was on ushering at work today, and me and my team were heading up the stairs when Laura (<3<3<3) said “Adam why’s your shirt tucked out? tuck it in!” so I took that as a sign that maybe I should take my shirt off so I lifted it up to reveal my finely toned gut and then started to unbutton it as a little slut show for Laura but then I turned around and saw little kids were heading towards me so I covered myself up and we all started laughing. Then after moving past the crowd some RUDE LITTLE GIRL goes “ehghrhg, what’s so funny?” in this proper sarcastic tone and I couldn’t believe it. This little girl freaking par’d us all off and there was nothing we could do about it. I wanted to push her down the stairs but I’d definitely get fired. but yeah, what a knob.

Monday, July 28, 2014

#niceonemax

(Source: snowexpress)

(Source: ruinedchildhood)

Sunday, July 27, 2014

(Source: youtube.com)

Saturday, July 26, 2014

This shift is making me want to harm the world. A bunch of underaged kids came to my till wanting to see The Purge but their collective fountain of youth glow blinded me so bad I said no. Then the lead girl was like “call my Dad he will tell you i’m 15” so I said “okay. But then I’ll call my Dad and he’ll agree with me that you’re not”. Then immediately after a group of LADS came up to me and of course their JOKERLAD had to be all “alright Adam how you doing m8” in his quirky tone so I walked away from them.

I drunk a bottle of cherry coke and ate a large Texas BBQ/American Hot half and half, wedges and three rennies before falling asleep yesterday and today IBS has turned me into the most glorious toilet waterfall ever. The worst part was still being able to smell of the jalapenos.

Friday, July 25, 2014

Lightning hit the cinema today! It was awesome. The storm lasted like 10/15 minutes with ridiculously heavy rain and then there was this monumental crashing noise followed by rumbling. It made all the screens and lights go off, and made the big metal doors behind me shut on their own which scared the dick off of me and we all had to run to the screens to let everybody know it was just lightning. It was well good.

Thursday, July 24, 2014

sunsdown:

THIS IS SO CUTE OH MY GOSH IT’S SO HAPPY AND THERE ARE SO MANY BALLS TO CHOOSE FROM AND THEN IN THE END IT’S JUST SO OVERWHELMED WITH HAPPINESS IT HAS TO LEAVE

(Source: puppygifs)